Including Children in Grief

Often the topic of grief and loss is more taboo when it comes to children.

Maybe you’re not quite sure how much you should tell them.  Maybe you’re not sure how much they’ll understand.  Maybe you don’t want to scare them.  Maybe you think they’re so young that they won’t remember.

There are so many reasons that makes it taboo to share with children, but it’s still important. During the holiday season especially, it can be healing to include them in the remembrance and honoring that is done for your loved one.

While children might not say as much about the loss or know how to process their feelings around the loss, they will still notice. The holidays specifically can be a time where children notice more than usual. They might notice their loved one is not there to help them put batteries in their new toys or their loved one is not there to sit next to at family dinner.

Including kids in this remembrance and celebration of the life that was lost can create an opportunity to teach them about the life our loved ones lived. It can allow children to create new traditions of honoring their loved one, and growing closer to the loved ones they are surrounded with. Finding an opportunity for remembrance can foster a path for new memories and growing through their healing.

This could be making an ornament to honor their loved one, lighting a candle in remembrance, baking their favorite cookies, or something that would be meaningful to the loved one that they've lost. Whatever avenue you choose, including children in grief can allow for new opportunities for healing in ways we don't often think of or expect.