Feeling Joy in Grief

Make space for joy

Numb.

Empty.

Dark.

Quiet. 

Lonely.

Despair.

Crying.

Sleepless nights.

Bad dreams.

Guilt.

Anger.

Denial.

There are a plethora of feelings and realities in the world of grief.  Chances are you have experienced a number of these feelings and things on this list on your journey through grief. Even more, the chances are you might experience more than what is on this list, based on your experiences and history. It’s a tough reality to live in.  It’s isolating, it’s challenging, and it feels like no one understands. It’s heavy, and it’s dark. 

But! Have hope – there is a bit of light in this good news.

You are allowed to feel joy.  You are allowed to smile.  You are encouraged to  look for the positive side of a tough situation.  While feeling joy and laughing and smiling does not take the pain away, it makes the hard days just a tiny bit easier to get through. 

This holiday season, remember to try to hold space for joy.  Certainly do not try to force it if you’re not feeling it, but hold space for it in case you’re able to find some.  Maybe you’ll find joy in a niece or nephew opening a new toy they were hoping to get.  Maybe you’ll find joy in bringing Christmas cookies to an elderly neighbor.  Maybe you’ll find joy in volunteering for an event that aligns to your values. Maybe you’ll find joy in a peppermint mocha latte.  Maybe you’ll find joy in sharing a home cooked meal with a friend. Maybe you’ll find joy by helping someone else. 

There are lots of avenues to venture down in search of joy, but the best news is that if we look enough, we will find that it can come naturally, if only we look for it. Feeling joy in grief can happen this holiday season if we allow it. Opening your heart to joy and light can bring a newfound hope to even the darkest season.